Along with behaviors we still deal with sensory issues with my special needs boy. As he grew old and while planning his transition I had made that to be one of my major concern in all his transition forms.
When we started preschool our issues were hyperactivity. A swing in his preschool class room calmed him down. Only when he was nine did we learn from an OT the extent of his sensory issues. A 3000 dollar out of pocket expense taught us all about sensory integration.
We worked really hard at home , but as we gained a few steps we lost a few with onset of puberty and behavior issues.
Gain happened with regard to his fine motor skills and tabletop activities. He started becoming aware of known places. He started understanding routines and life became easy for him. He is currently very fluent on the assigned tasks at home and he needs minimum to no prompts.
So where are we when it comes to places out of comfort zone. He is still like a bull in a china shop. He tries his best by clinging on to me sometimes or locking himself in a bathroom. The outside world is still overwhelming. My brother keeps encouraging me to find him a job at amazon, (I have sent him pictures of him carrying groceries) and I am grateful for his hope but things are not as easy it looks. There are too many pieces of puzzle that needs to be put together before we can drop by with a job application.
But the mother in me keeps thinking, we have come this far why not more. Am I being overambitious or greedy I don’t know. I did not expect him to load the laundry or unload the dishwasher when he was 3. So without expectations I will continue with all the sensory exercises and activities for him to move outside his comfort zone.
Few days back my YouTube channel suggested me a video where a therapist was asked which needs to be done at age 3, speech or occupational therapy. I smiled at it since, at 25 we still need both. This seems to be a continuous process for us.
Weddings nowadays are extravagant! Ours was simple compared to how things are happening now😀. My husband keeps saying we should renew our vows like how Raymond did it on “Everybody Loves Raymond” ! My son loves music so we may have sangeet and of course I love mehandi , so maybe that one! These two pieces weren’t there during our wedding.
We may end up doing that for shastiabdapoorthy or the 60th birthday celebrations of my husband when the wedding is renewed in our culture. Considering my husband a shy type I think it is may just be a small gathering. We have few more years to think about. But whatever it is, it will be with our special boy and we will end up doing what makes him happy and what he can be part of in a comfortable way. That we are sure about.
My killdeer birds are back near the baseball field. But their eggs seem to be moving and eggs are missing too. Yesterday evening there were 4 and today just one. The birds have been making a lot of noise too. In fact lot of people have started noticing them this year. and are curious what is happening. No wedding for the birds but they seem to try to keep their family happy.
Monday was a hot day for us. I heard on news that it is good to be out in the sun since it helps to improve our serotonin level. If that were the case that no one should be depressed in the tropics.
I deal with my son’s anxiety and I have learnt about dopamine and serotonin for the past two decades. It is not easy to live with a mental health condition. But I have learnt being active helps. Even on cold weather days we have gone for walks. We have continued to do activities at home that can keep the brain active and happy.
My son does need meds to help him be calm, but we are trying our best to do all other things that can help alternatively. So yes, we love hot weather days, when we can go on picnics and have a lunch with an iced drink. We have been religiously doing picnics that have helped not only my son but our entire family. Maybe sun does help with serotonin levels. (maybe not to the level of stopping meds, but not increasing them!)
So eagerly waiting for all the picnic days ahead of us.
Excited to share my jasmine buds today morning. With all the hot weather I thought it would have bloomed, but not yet. I have to be patient. This is a tropical plant and had to be brought in for winter. This one survived this winter.
At the dining table, I would get pinched all of a sudden by my special boy . Further investigation would show he was provoked by his little brother who would have disturbed him under the table with the foot😂! A common scenario when you have loving brothers.
It is hard to maintain peace at home, how do we expect one in the world!
When I was a little girl, I was too proud since my house had a television, a black and white one. We used to have kids in our street coming to our house to watch cricket matches. The Sunday evening movies had lot of distorted pictures and the broadcasting local station had a card that always showed Sorry for the interruption, normal programming would resume soon. Even with all these interruptions and distortions the thrill of watching movies at home was immense.
I remember watching a broadcast of the then Prime Minister Indra Gandhi making a speech at the UN in color. It was at my friend’s house and I hoped one day we would have one too. It was in the mid 80s that we got color television and I still remember the first program I saw in color.
By 90s television and the industry had grown so much that the first thing I asked my husband was a good Television with all the channels. My husband always kept his promise. Even though we moved from India to US and around US, our new home would always have a TV with all the channels. Yes I was being spoilt by my husband. Few years ago we had saved points at Sears and got our 50 inch TV for free. Ha Ha what a proud moment it was!
As streaming services and demand channels are on rise, I still love all my cable channels. Though I have amazon prime membership, I love to watch TV on regular cable We don’t watch much TV together but its always fun to watch the weather and the news early in the morning and of course love to look at school closings during winter time.
I hope my cable provider doesn’t read this or he may just add a surcharge to the bill next month. 😀
I have had people ask me how to interact with my son. I have been asked how much he understands. The answer is simple . Please be with him and you will learn on your own. My younger one is eight years younger to my special boy. He started understanding his brother by the time he was 2 years old. Did I teach him or educate him? Ha ha, no way. He learnt just being with him.
Today at the pool, my special boy rushed to sit in the hot tub, when the lifeguard showed his hand to slow him. He gave a high five ✋ and went in. I was a few feet behind him so had missed the precious interaction. I was overwhelmed with happiness when the lifeguard came and told me what happened. Small joys in life!
I love when my neighbors say hi 👋 to my son while we are walking. I love when people comment on his haircut. I usually buy him T shirts when we travel. I love when people ask him if he had enjoyed the place. These small interactions are huge both for me and my son.
I do know and I do understand that every individual has their own problems but a small effort can be made like a smile or a high five that can make another person’s day happy. You don’t need to put in hours of therapy just to learn interaction. A few seconds is enough.
I have never written two blogs in one single day. But as I was winding down my day, I read the above post on Facebook and I thought why not make a pitch for the above cause.
Ragtag community prompt for the day was pitch and all through the day I was thinking about baseball pitch and music pitch, who knew I would be writing about a different kind of pitch today just before going to bed!!!