We all would like to sleep at 10 pm and get up at 6 am all fresh with no burning eyes or aching body. But reality is different for so many people for so many reasons. Everyone keeps blaming the phone, television, food habits and so on. There are so many kinds of sleep aides from melatonin to prescription ones that help people.
My special one has had sleep problem all through his life. By the way when he was little there were not smart phone devices nor was he addicted to any TV program. But he never slept. As he grew I understood these were are anxiety driven caused by sensory needs and his diet also played a major role. I remember a night when my husband made a phone call to my Mom asking her to come and help us. My special one was 3 and half years old and my Mom who was in her forties came and spent three and half months with us so we could catch up on our Zees.
So how is he sleeping now? We have so many things in place right now that he has learnt to fall asleep and sleep through the night. But none is guaranteed. We have more nights he sleeps than sleepless nights and me and my husband have learnt to sleep taking turns or watch out for him. He also has learnt not to leave the room or get out of the house. Yet, sometimes, he throws himself a party. He would have ransacked our fridge to make his own food and have a midnight snack party. The middle aged body is now having a hard time coping up with this young adult but touch wood as I said these are far and few.
Without our knowledge me and my husband have a system in which my husband sleeps in early and I late and he gets up early and me late. That way one of us is there to watch him if he is sleeping late or is waking up early. As I write it may look confusing but it is a system that has worked for us.
As I grow old, I too have my own issues and have sometimes trouble falling asleep or my husband is having trouble falling asleep when he gets for his midnight bathroom break. These are the new challenges we are facing in raising a special needs person.
The evening walks we make in our local park or inside our recreation center is one important piece to our sleep. Two days back, I asked my Mom to pray that my boy should fall asleep since he had started a cycle in which he was getting up in the middle of the night. Now in her seventies, that is only she can do. Yes she did and it seems we are back to a routine.
It has been eight years since we have been to India. I really would love to make that trip. We have practiced and trained our boy so much but I dread the 10 and half hour jet lag. It is not that easy for a normal human being. It would be such a big burden for my special needs boy.
There is a saying in Tamil (my language), “பின் தூங்கி முன் எழுவாள் மனைவி”, a wife sleeps after her husband and gets up before him. This is how our situation in our household is. Sleeping after my boy and getting before him and a routine based on his sleep.
If you get eight hours of solid sleep consider yourselves blessed 😊. It is a privilege and do not take it for granted.
Special Mom’s blog 
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